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Sunday, December 6, 2009

Why is Death and Grieving So Difficult?

I think our views of death (as well as the closeness of our relationship with the deceased) affects how we express grief. My view of death is that it is a normal part of life--the end of one life phase and the beginning of another. It is common for deceased loved ones to hang out with me.My Aunt Kat is with me in spirit. Therefore, I don't feel sad for her. She's starting her new journey in the afterlife.

I also think that the age of the deceased and his or her condition  prior to death has a lot to do with how survivors grieve. Knowing that Kat is not suffering physically gives me great consolation. However, it would be horrible to lose a child or a healthy person. We believe we are all supposed to live long, healthy lives--not be cut short by illness or injury. Our beliefs about dying young create a strong sense of loss. It's something none of us wish to go through. It's hard to find purpose in the loss of a child.

I'm working with a client who lost her son when he was a junior in high school. Her son has come to her in spirit many times, urging her to write about her healing journey that his death provided. He had a purpose in dying young. It was to help his mother's soul heal and create the life she was destined to enjoy in spite of her loss. I can hardly wait to share her book with my readers.

Talking about death should not be hard. We make it difficult because we fear upsetting others or perhaps we fear death itself, but the truth is it is very healing to talk with others about our deceased or dying loved ones.My grandmother (Nanny) and I talk openly and easily about death. We've both had near-death experiences (NDE) and have felt the peace of being spirit without a body. Maybe the purpose of my NDE was to help me share comfort with you and offer a compassionate voice of reason.


My cousins are grieving the loss of their mother, my Aunt Kat. One is taking is pretty hard, but I think there may be more guilt involved than grief. One cousin is doing quite well. She did all she could to support and assist her mother in her last days. She has nothing to feel guilty about. She may feel sad, but she is able to talk freely and positively about her mother. 
  • Have you talked about your loss? 
  • Can you find meaning in death? 
  • What are your views about death?

Feel free to leave a comment and share your thoughts and feelings. I might be a very therapeutic part of your journey to wholeness.

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For more information, you might enjoy reading the complete book More Than Meets the Eye True Stories about Death, Dying, and Afterlife. Purchase on Amazon.com

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