If you take time to reach the stillness of your own heart, you will raise your vibration and enter alpha or theta brainwave stage (http://www.finerminds.com/mind-power/brain-waves/) where you are more likely to sense her presence and share a sweet exchange of loving energy. (Delta, or deep sleep, is also a time when you might connect.) During these peaceful meditation moments, you may also be able to connect with other family members who are of a high vibration.
Those spirits who are manipulative have a denser astral body and you will likely be able to sense their presence more easily. They are a closer match to the vibration of the earth plane and its chaos. You can tell them to "take a hike" any time they bother you. Your personal energy field and private space is yours to control. You do not have to be bothered by these spirits.
For more information, you might enjoy reading my book, More Than Meets the Eye True Stories about Death, Dying, and Afterlife. Purchase paperback on Amazon.com. It's also on Amazon as an e-book for those who have Kindle or Sony Readers. The audio book is now available!