Stages of Processing Grief

While I believe that each person has the right to choose their own healthcare and treatment, some will undoubtedly have a better attitude and cooperate with their health care providers more than others. Some patients may be angry that they are dying. They are just not ready to accept the inevitable. Anger is a normal part of the five stages of grief noted by Elisabeth Kubler-Ross:

1. Denial
2. Anger
3. Bargaining
4. Depression
5. Acceptance

Hospice care is not about fighting death or prolonging life with drugs, surgical procedures or technology. It's about making the patient as peaceful and comfortable as possible emotionally, mentally, spiritually and physically while preparing for transition.

While each person goes through the grieving process differently, your being aware of what to expect during each stage will help you support the patient in a holistic manner—body, soul and spirit—and educate the family and loved ones.

If you are not familiar with the stages of the grief process, you may find more information on Wikipedia.com: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/K%C3%BCbler-Ross_model

Coming to Terms with the End of Life

When I wrote More Than Meets the Eye About Death, Dying, and Afterlife, I interviewed Dr. Aaron Milstone who was co-director of the Lung Transplant Department at Vanderbilt University Medical Center. By the time patients reached his office, they were many times nearing the end of life. Therefore, he witnessed the death of many of his patients. However, many doctors are not comfortable with telling patients that they are dying. this skill is not typically taught in medical school.  In fact, it goes against the grain of medicine and physicians who many times see the death of their patient as a personal failure.

Here are some tips for doctors who need to tell family members that there's nothing more that can be done to save their loved one's life.

When Dr. Milstone realizes that a patient is going to die, he says it is helpful to remind him or her and the family that physicians are only human, and that there is a limit to what medicine can do. Regardless of how skilled practitioner, it reaches a point where medical therapy is not be able to help someone survive.

Some of the phrases Dr. Milstone uses in his end-of-life discussions with the family are:

“We’ve reached the limit of what medicine can do for your husband, your child, your brother, your sister,” and “Your loved one has reached the natural path of this illness and now we are going to let nature take its final course, and let your loved one die in peace.”

These words help families accept that the end is near. When people understand that death is a natural result of a disease, there is no need for blaming anyone or feeling guilty about the decision to remove life support.

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For more information, you might enjoy reading the complete book More Than Meets the Eye True Stories about Death, Dying, and Afterlife.
Purchase on Amazon.com

Common Signs that Death is Near

How can you tell if death is about to occur for a critically ill patient? According to About.com, the following are physical signs that indicate the time of death is approaching.

• Major changes in respiratory health, buildup of fluid in the lungs, congestion, longer periods of sleep, and abnormal breathing patterns such as cycles of slow then fast breathing.
• Difficulties swallowing liquids or the resistance of all food and drink.
• Increased difficulty waking subject from sleeping, the inability to arouse them at all, or a coma-like state.
• Subject is unresponsive or cannot speak.
• Subject does not move for long periods of time.
• The extremities—hands, feet, arms and legs—feel very cold to touch. Subject may say that they are numb or cannot feel at all.
• Mottling of the arms, legs, hands and feet, giving a blue or purple splotchy appearance to the skin.
• Decrease in urination with urine darkening in color or changing colors.
• Urinary or bowel incontinence.
• A continued drop in blood pressure to 20 to 30 points below normal range or a systolic pressure below 70 with a diastolic below 50 points.
• Loss of hearing, feeling, smell, taste or sight at the final stage.
• Marked changes in personality, acting wildly, severe agitation or hallucinations.
• Patient states that he or she is going to die soon. Before my uncle Edmond passed in 2001, he told us that he would not be here after the 28th of December. He went into a coma and fulfilled his own prophecy.
• Reports seeing deceased loved ones, Jesus, patron saints, or angels. Since this is the only thing on our list that has nothing to do with a bodily function, I’d like to address it in a little more detail later on.

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For more information, you might enjoy reading the complete book More Than Meets the Eye True Stories about Death, Dying, and Afterlife.
Purchase on Amazon.com

How Do the Deceased Communicate with the Living?

We have more than five senses with which to explore and experience life. We are multi-sensory spiritual creatures able to sense the presence and energy of non-physical beings.

Our “deceased” loved ones often communicate with us in a variety of ways. They may bring a familiar smell, or leave coins, feathers, or other objects in our path. They may appear as a bird, an animal or take human form. They may come to us in our dreams, or may be the voice we hear in our head. No matter how you sense their presence you can be assured that they really are near and they want to communicate.

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For more information, you might enjoy reading the complete book More Than Meets the Eye True Stories about Death, Dying, and Afterlife. Purchase on Amazon.com

Meet Atlanta Hospice Director Barbara Moore

On Monday, July 12, I spoke at the staff meeting for Atlanta Hospice. What a wonderful group of people! Here is a photo of me with my gracious hostess, Barbara Moore, Director of Volunteer and Support Services for Visiting Nurses. Barbara welcomes anyone interested in volunteering their time or talent to make a difference in patients’ lives at the center or via in-home visits. Contact Barbara Moore at 404-869-3000 or Volunteer Coordinator Ann Serrie, 404-848-7955.

During my talk, I  talked related some of the end-of-life commonalities and differences that may be seen by those who work as a member of a hospice team or care for a patient living with a terminal illness. In the upcoming days,  I will post excerpts from my speech on this blog.

Everyone's life is different because our experience is defined by our choices and beliefs. We may share similar life stories, human characteristics, and basic needs to sustain life, but we are unique individuals.

The same is true about our dying experience. Those who die a natural death may share common occurrences as the end nears, but that experience may be slightly different depending upon an individual’s belief systems.

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For more information, you might enjoy reading the complete book More Than Meets the Eye True Stories about Death, Dying, and Afterlife.

Purchase on Amazon.com

 

A New Show for the Spiritually-inclined

For those who love to talk about spiritual matters such as seeing ghosts and angels, channeling, religion, empathetic abilities, intuition, human divinity, deities, chakras, Christ consciousness, divine and inner guidance, unity and oneness, energy modalities, enlightenment, healing and intuitive arts, heaven/hell, karma, last days, magic, manifesting reality, meditation, mediumship, metaphysics, ancient spirituality, new age, pantheism, past lives, prayer, psychic gifts, paranormal phenomena, reincarnation, spiritual communication and guidance, spiritual and personal transformation, and universal laws.

The show may not be a fit for everyone, but if you are interested in reading the posts on the blog as well as listening to the show, go to http://weareoneinspirit.blogspot.com.

You may want to subscribe to the blog so you'll get a reminder when something new is posted. If you are only interested listening to the shows, you may subscribe to the RSS feed at http://nashvillewriter.audioacrobat.com/rss/we_are_one_in_spirit.xml.

Thank you for being part of my life!

Yvonne Perry
http://writersinthesky.com

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For more information, you might enjoy reading the complete book More Than Meets the Eye True Stories about Death, Dying, and Afterlife.

Purchase on Amazon.com

Meet Dr. Caron Goode Author of Kids Who See Ghosts, Guide Them Through Their Fear

Today we welcome Dr. Caron Goode to our writing blog. She is discussing her book Kids Who See Ghosts, Guide Them Through Their Fear.

Dr. Caron Goode is gifted with compassion in assisting others to effect lasting transformation through spiritual coaching, books, classes and seminars. Caron’s continuous education, experience in psychology and professional writing makes her a great resource for parents wishing to create and maintain a nurturing relationship their children. The common thread of these disciplines is energy of the mind-body-spirit connection and how to access it, bring it into focus and then put it into successful action.

YVONNE: Tell me something about your writing background.
CARON: A creative writing teacher in high school told me I had talent, and that was new to me. I always had an interest writing, which I think came from a veracious reading appetite. At her encouragement, I entered several small writing contests and my entry won. Later as a teacher and diagnostician, I wrote lessons, curriculum, reports—educational writing—and received many professional accolades. Yet I never saw myself as a writer. My writing was always related to my profession, but never became my profession until midlife. The creativity peaked in my forties when thoughts of writing a book crept in. In my fifties, the dam opened and writing books on quirky subjects, great stories, and inspirational topics have become a fun passion.

YVONNE: Your story sounds similar to mine. It was a high school creative writing teacher who believed in me and helped me realize I had a talent for writing. What is the title of your book? Give us the basic story line so we’ll know what it’s about.
CARON: Kids Who See Ghosts, Guide Them Through Their Fears is a response to hundreds of questions from parents about their children seeing apparitions, from ghosts to demons to angels. Seventeen interviews from professionals, parents, psychics, even a skeptic, presents an up front and personal look at the phenomenon. Mostly it is about helping kids move through fears and not be paralyzed by such events.

YVONNE: I can relate so well to your book. I’ve seen into the spirit realm many times and have a grandson who also did when he was younger. What inspired you to write this book?
CARON: These questions about kids who see ghosts poured in after I started a blog on intuitive intelligence and children. I posted my opinion about the A & E channel program called Psychic Kids Who See Ghosts. My marketing specialists, Diane Bourgeois, of Marketing Magic USA said I had a niche there, and I was perfectly qualified to write the book. Moreover I was inspired by my childhood experiences of growing up very “Irish Catholic” and seeing the saints when I was a child. I thought everyone saw them.

YVONNE: I’ve seen the show you are talking about and I was amazed at the way the show not only demonstrated the gift these kids have, but also their fears surrounding it. At the end of the show, the children were more accepting of their gift and felt less isolated once their parents understood that the kids were perfectly normal. I really appreciate your writing the book to help adults guide psychic kids. Is this the first book you have written?
CARON: No, this is not my first book. I have a dozen books in education, parenting, and health under my belt.

YVONNE: How long did it take to write this book?
CARON: I wrote this book in three months, which is very tight for me.

YVONNE: Any interesting tidbits about your writing method or how the book developed?
CARON: I am a slow writer. My first draft contains words that are carefully considered. If I can say it with one word and not three, I do write in stages–gather all material, include all material on the topic, and then I have a draft of the 200-page count. From there, I will hone it down, tighten, edit, and cut. I may go through the manuscript twice or five times. I also find I need an editor to clean up the details and polish the text.

Like most writers, I also go with my gut. If a section doesn’t feel right or flow right, I have to stop and fix it. If I do not, the editor always catches it.

YVONNE: We all need editors. Even though I earn a living as an editor, I still have my own books edited. It’s hard to catch our own mistakes no matter how many times we go over the text. And, I love the way you trust your intuition about a passage not “feeling” right. We would all do well to listen to our intuition more. Tell me about your publishing experience and what you learned from it.

CARON: My agent loved the book idea and sold it to the publisher quickly. So Red Wheel/Weiser supports authors well and thoroughly reviews the book through two or three sets of eyes. I have excitement because this year, for this book, I have an enthusiastic team who love the book and are going all out to make it sell well. This is in contrast to the previous year when Raising Intuitive Children received little support from the team.

YVONNE: Being picked up by a conventional publisher certainly does ensure good marketing. It’s still up to the author to do a lot of promotion like you are doing. Where is your book available? Do you have a Web site or blog where we can learn more about you or your book?
CARON: My Web site is www.kidswhoseeghosts.com and the book will be on Amazon.com

YVONNE: Tell me some ways you have promoted your book. Give examples and links to any sites you feel might help other authors.
CARON: We are promoting through a syndicated column, Kids Who See Ghosts . . .
Blog Tour. I think your site and www.spiritauthors.com are wonderful sites for all writers, whether new or seasoned. We are having a blog tour for the book, as well as an Amazon email campaign.

YVONNE: I’m looking forward to posting on your syndicated column and I’m thrilled to be part of your blog tour for this wonderful book. Any other comment you would like to share?
CARON: Thanks for the opportunity to be on your site, which is a phenomenal resource for writers. I subscribe to your e-zine and recommend your work to others.
Thank you for giving us the opportunity to get to know you and learn about your book. I wish you well in your journey as an author.

YVONNE: I’m glad to be able to help writers and authors. I truly appreciate your support, Caron. It is a privilege to network with you. I wish you much success on this timely and well-written book.

Listen to an interview with Dr. Goode and Yvonne Perry on http://weareoneinspirit.blogspot.com

Atlanta Hospice

Many people in nursing homes and hospice care are without the loving presence and spiritual support of friends or family. There is a great need for compassionate volunteers, but not everyone is up to the task of assisting people in their transition. It takes a special person to walk in, meet someone for the first time, talk intimately with them, and hold their hand, all the while knowing that person may not be around the next time they come to visit. Yet, this blessed gift of friendship is crucial in helping a soul leave peacefully.

I truly appreciate and applaud the people who give loving service to people like my aunt Kathryn who passed last November after a year in hospice and my grandmother who will turn 94 this coming Saturday.


On Monday, July 12 at 6 p.m., I will be the guest speaker for a training meeting of the Visiting Nurses staff of Atlanta Hospice. I will be talking about some of the end-of-life commonalities and differences typically seen in by hospice workers. This will include an open forum about spirit visitation.

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For more information, you might enjoy reading the complete book More Than Meets the Eye True Stories about Death, Dying, and Afterlife.

Purchase on Amazon.com

The Spirit of My Husband's Father Visited Us

I suppose this is an amendment or clarification to yesterday's post on The Sid Series blog in which I spoke about my grandson hearing a spirit in my house when he stayed with us last weekend.

Even though my husband's father just passed last week, it didn't dawn on me that Jack might be visiting us. That is until I came home from picking up dinner and walk into the garage and saw the ghost of a man. The apparition only lasted a split second and faded.

My husband opened the door to let me in and immediately asked, "What's wrong?"

"I just saw a ghost. That's all."

"Sidney told you we had a spirit in the house."

"Yes, but who is it?" I asked. "Oh, wait a big 'duh' minute. I felt this strange energy when Sid was here; I felt it the moment you called to tell me Jack had died. I felt it that evening when you came home from work, and I feel it now. It has to be your dad."

"Makes sense. Maybe we should light a candle for him."

Usually, spirits come to me because they want me to help them cross over or give a message to their loved one. So we lit a candle and asked Jack what he needed us to do for him. Within just a few seconds my husband and I both felt an energy surge.

"Looking for Virginia." I repeated what I was hearing in my mind. Virginia was my husband's mother's name. She passed before Randy and I met one another. "Is your dad looking for your mom?"

"No. I sense that my mom has reincarnated . . .  She is embodied as one of my grandkids."

The energy level around us surged again. I tried on a few of the grandkids. Elise's kids? No. Ryah's baby? No. Keilie? A little stronger feeling.

"Definitely one of Jackson's kids," I confirmed. I thought of Mac and got a little stronger resonance with that guess. Kind of like the game cold, warm, warmer, warmer, . . . HOT!

"Lochlan," Randy said.  We both had a huge energy rush--an indication that we were correct.

So, it turns out that we didn't need to do anything for Jack. He had a message for us. We thanked Jack and spent a few more minutes with him. The energy let up and I dismissed the session.

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For more information about spirit communication, you might enjoy reading the complete book More Than Meets the Eye True Stories about Death, Dying, and Afterlife.

Purchase on Amazon.com

Are You an Empath?

An empath is someone who is able to sense the thoughts, feelings, and energy (positive or negative) of others. Many times, empaths are able to see or hear in the spirit realm. Here is a quiz to see what type of empath you are: http://quizfarm.com/what-empathic-type-are-you/

Everyone has empathic ability. Some are just super sensitive and don't realize they are picking up and carrying the energetic burdens of others. It can manifest in harmful ways for them if they don't know how to protect themselves and set boundaries. It helps to know what to look for. I hope to write a book to help others gain insight.

Let me know your test results and if you would like to share your story with me for a book I am writing to help empaths understand this gift and how it operates. Contact me: http://writersinthesky.com/contact.php


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For more information, you might enjoy reading the complete book More Than Meets the Eye True Stories about Death, Dying, and Afterlife. Purchase on Amazon.com

Blog and Podcast on Spiritual Topics

If you are interested in more spiritual topics, you might enjoy my blog and podcast We Are One in Spirit.This week's podcast guest shares his experience in seeing and touching ectoplasm (the essence of ghosts) as it streamed from a full-manifestation trance medium!

Learn more or listen to my interview with Dr. Jan Vandersande at We Are One in Spirit.

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For more information, you might enjoy reading my book More Than Meets the Eye True Stories about Death, Dying, and Afterlife.

Purchase on Amazon.com

Precognizant, Clairaudient, and Clairsentient Abilities

My friend Iris wrote me again this week with another significant story that I want to share with my readers. Even though Iris is a Christian, she has some very obvious psychic gifts in operation. These are referred to by Pentacostal Christians as the gifts of the Spirit (I Corinthians 12: 4-8).


Here is Iris' story:

One day when I was 13, my dad planned a fishing trip with the family. As much as I love fishing, that sunny July morning was quite frightening. The previous night I had been twisting and turning unable to sleep. That day as everyone happily approached the van for our trip, I felt a magnetic force pulling me away along with discomfort and nausea. I begged my dad to please reschedule the trip. I told him that I felt sick and scared and that we shouldn't go. Confused by my sudden behavior, he commanded me to get in the van.

When we arrived at the lake we did the usual "spread out no more than 12 ft rule." I was still freaked and disturbed but spoke to no one about anything. I took my fishing pole and sat on a rock. Two minutes later my little sister came to sit next to me. I tried to kick her out of my spot but she begged me to let her stay. She asked me what was wrong and why I didn't want to come on the trip.

Out of nowhere I heard a distant, shattered voice yelling, " Help me!"

I immediately said, "Shhhh! Listen. Did you hear that?"

My sister said she didn't hear zip and looked at me like I was crazy.

As I kept hearing the same words, I noticed it was coming from the other side of the lake. The voice sounded like a flute, not like a human voice.Then I realized it was coming out of the actual water. I ran to my dad and told him that I heard voices from the other side of the lake. He said that there was no one at the other side because it was closed to the public and that I should take a nap. He kicked me out of his fishing spot.

At this point I thought I was going crazy! Anyway, I went back to my spot and thought no further on it. I just started drawing. A half hour later I heard family members crying and yelling, "We lost him!" Apparently, one of my 16-year-old cousins decided to sneak off to catch the larger fish where the boats go. My cousin Danny had won awards for being the best swimmer and fisher, yet he drowned that day.

When my dad was alive, he warned me to never tell these stories to anyone because it might lead them astray from the Christian faith. Now that my dad is gone I feel free to tell all of my stories. Boy there are many.

Ms. Yvonne, what was the magnetic force that kept me from getting in the van and made me nauseated. What about the voice? Was it his before he died or after?

###

Iris, you have precognizant, clairaudient, and clairsentient gifts at work in your life, and I'm willing to bet you have had many "sensings" or feelings similar to the one in your story.


The magnetic pull was spirit's way of getting your attention in order to get your dad to cancel the trip.  You were spiritually aware that something bad was going to happen that day. This is precognizance.

You could have heard the voice crying for help before or during the time the drowning was occurring--while there was still time to help. Had his voice come to you after the drowning, your cousin might have given you a "good-bye" message for the rest of the family.

The feeling of nausea is a clairsentient gift. Many healers use this gift to ascertain where in the body their patients need a healing flow of energy directed.

It's not typical for Christian families to discuss experiences that either do not align with their Biblical doctrine or are frowned upon by the church. Such may be the case with your dad telling you not to speak of your paranormal experiences. However, had your dad listened to you that day, your cousin would still be alive. We do our children a great injustice when we "hush" them like your dad did.

Sometimes, as Dr. Caron Goode's book (Kids Who See Ghosts) explains, parents don't know what to do with kids who see or hear spirits or predict future events. In some cases, the "hushing" parent also has some unexplainable paranormal gifts in operation that he or she is not comfortable talking about—maybe they were "hushed" by their parents and are simply passing down the advice they were given. I can't prove it, but I suspect by intuition this is the case with your dad. He knew better than to go to church on Sunday and admit that he saw ghosts, and he didn't want his kids doing it either.

Many times people remain in a dogmatic religion even when they know it doesn't align with their true-to-life experiences. Rather than doubt the church or research the validity of its teachings, folks shut down their spiritual gifts rather than using them to benefit others.

Thank you for sharing your wonderful story, Iris. I encourage you to click on the links in this post and read or listen to obtain more information to help you understand and use your gifts.

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For more information, you might enjoy reading the complete book More Than Meets the Eye True Stories about Death, Dying, and Afterlife. Purchase on Amazon.com

Brother's Spirit Visits Sister at His Time of Death

A reader named Iris sent me the following story about her brother visiting her in a dream at the moment of his death. He was in the hospital and she was at home. At the end of her story she asks a question that I would like to address. "Did he just sneak to my house before the angels got a hold of him and dressed him in white?" Read on . . . Here's Iris:

My older brother Hector had cirrhosis in the liver. He was a strong Christian. He was admitted to the hospital the night of November 20 1999. It was five days before my birthday. November 25th he called my house complaining about the hospital food and wanted me to bring him some rice and beans. I spoke to his nurse and she warned me not to bring him anything because his liver wasn't filtering and any wrong food can be a toxin to him.

I visited my brother that same night and he surprised me with a piece of cake and a candle. That was so sweet of him. I explained to him about the rice and beans. We spent lots of time giggling and talking about Thanksgiving dinner.

On November 27th I had a dream that Hector came to my room and kissed my hand. He was dressed in his hospital gown. He said, " I just came to say goodbye, Sis."

That morning I woke up and my room was freezing cold and it stunk like hospital. It was 6 a.m. Everything felt so weird and off key but I got up, took a shower, and did my normal routine. That afternoon I called the hospital to see how my brother was doing. The nurse told me to come in immediately. When I got there they told me my brother was dead. "HUH?" I asked how come no one had called me. They had called while I was in the shower. I asked what time he died. They said that at 5:45 am he went into coma and his heart stopped. They tried to resuscitate him but they couldn't.

As long as I live I will never forget the fact that my brother came to me in my dream to say goodbye. I don't get it though. Did he just sneak to my house before the angels got a hold of him and dressed him in white?

###

To answer Iris' question, I must first of all note that this is a Christian family. Nothing wrong with that, but the western Christian faith interprets the Bible with some inaccurate things regarding the afterlife. Since there is no literal place known as heaven or hell (other than what we create in our minds; and that is done more here on earth than in the afterlife), some souls choose to hang around their loved ones—especially near the time of death and several days or week after the spirit departs from the body. Just like the soul who comes here from the Other Side and takes residence in the body of a baby, there may be some disorientation to begin with. (This doesn't seem to be the case with Iris' brother. He knew he was leaving and seemed glad to venture on.) Once the soul acclimates to being bodiless, it may move on to other realms. However, some stay around indefinitely. We might call them earth-bound spirits.

Just as in this earth life where we have freedom to choose, so it is in the afterlife. We may travel (as we do many times in our dreams) to visit other people, places, and even explore new experiences. Having a loved one's spirit visit is a very common occurrence and truly a blessing as in this case where the brother loving said goodbye to his dear sister. Isn't that a joy to know that he cared so much to do that?

The fact that he didn't return again probably means that he felt she was able to handle his departure, or that he visits in her dream state and she doesn't consciously remember it. Or, he may be giving Iris signs that she's not recognizing.

My grandfather's spirit visited me late one evening this week. He passed in 1988 and visited me quite often in the years following, but it had been probably six or more years since I last felt his presence near me. When I used to cut his hair I could smell the "old man" pheromones coming from his scalp. It was this same smell that let me know it was him when I sensed his presence in my bedroom as I was falling asleep.

Spirits communicate with us through all senses and they give us signs such as leaving an object in your path about which you might say, "Oh, my brother loved [name the item]." The fact that you are being reminded of him, is a good indication that he is popping in to check on you. You may want to read Denise Linn's book, the Secret Language of Signs to learn more about the signs God, angels, and loved one use to communicate with us.

It's so good to know that we are able to communicate our love from the Other Side to those on this earth plane. The soul of never dies.

Thank you, Iris, for sharing your beautiful story with us. I wish you and your brother many more pleasant and endearing encounters as you learn to look for his presence.

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For more information, you might enjoy reading my book More Than Meets the Eye True Stories about Death, Dying, and Afterlife.

Purchase on Amazon.com

Kids Who See Ghosts, Guide Them Through Their Fear

Kids Who See Ghosts, Guide Them Through Their Fear
Dr. Caron Goode
Weiser Books, 2010
ISBN: 978-1-57863-472-9
Reviewed by Yvonne Perry
http://kidswhoseeghosts.com/partners/



This book was a very enlightening read. I learned a lot—not only about kids who see ghosts, but about how and why it is possible to see spirits in another dimension. The electromagnetic spectrum of wavelengths of radiation is huge, but the narrow band (between 380 and 760 nanometers) that we call light and that most humans can see is a very small fraction of what actually exists. Typically, what we humans can’t see with our naked eye or what our brains can’t understand is thought to be nonexistent, but other species can see these wavelengths. For example, a rattlesnake can see the whole infrared spectrum and ultraviolet ranges. A microscope reveals a world within our world. A telescope shows us things in space that 100 years ago we would never thought existed. You can’t see radio waves, gamma rays, X-rays, or microwaves, but they are very real. Just because you can’t see something, does not mean it doesn’t exist. It is possible that the eyes of a child have the ability to see in more ranges and spectrums than an adult.

The fact that children see things adults don’t is also explained by brain development and whether or not the culture in which the child lives accepts seeing spirit walkers as the norm. Children have not been conditioned like adults have and therefore do not know that they are not “supposed” to see spirit walkers.

Through reading this book I also learned that many things can trigger a ghostly experience by activating the temporal lobe, the part of the brain associated with psychic activity. When in a meditative, altered, or dissociated state of awareness, it is possible to see into these “hidden” spectrums even if only momentarily. Any person under stress or trauma can phase in and out of the brain states that are open to seeing apparitions. Younger children’s brain waves tend to linger in the dreamy states. Psychiatrist Carl Jung believed that ghosts and hauntings were universal occurrences. I believe that as society begins to accept paranormal experiences as scientifically and physically possible and more people are free to talk about their psychic vision, these gifts will be used in a positive and productive manner.

Caron affirms that children (and adults) who see ghosts are not crazy. Children should be allowed to talk about seeing spirit walkers without fear of being judged or reprimanded. Therefore, traditional parenting and teaching styles do not work with intuitive kids who see ghosts. Regardless of whether they believe in ghosts, parents of these psychic kids can learn to integrate spirit communication as a matter-of-fact part of life. When a child speaks about seeing a ghost, casually remind the child that he or she can set boundaries and is in control. Since the intention of some ghosts is not the best or of the light, it is wise for a parent to be discerning about whether to allow a ghost to remain. Kids can exert their power over spirits in much the same way they would if a bully was bothering them. It is fine to tell a spirit to “Go to the light” or “Leave me alone.” Teach the child to call upon his or her guardian angels for protection.

My next paragraph is excerpted from the book because I feel it is important for readers to know that you or your child are not at the mercy of intruding ghosts. Children can defend themselves spiritually.

“Any child can insist on and demand to experience only that which is for his or her highest good and the highest good of all concerned. And learning how to tell the difference in the voices is very easy to do. Learning those differences puts you on the high road to work with, study from, and expose yourself to only those beings, voices, and energies that are truly for your highest good. You don’t have to put up with the other stuff.”

In Section 6, Dr. Goode gives useful tips for parents with various thinking styles to help children according to their individual temperaments cope with fear and incorporate an empowered approach to life—not just for managing their fear of ghosts, but for dealing with anything they may be afraid of. This chapter is worth the read even if your child doesn’t report seeing ghosts. Healthy interaction with the invisible worlds can give us the information, support, and caring we need to become healthy human beings.

The only thing I did not like about the book was the section in which Joe Nickell suggested telling children that ghosts do not exist except in our minds. This entire chapter seems to contradict and undo the comfort and encouragement provided by the other experts in the book.

As the author states, it’s much easier to give a child a pill than to educate yourself and adopt a new parenting method. It takes courage to teach or raise intuitive children. I’m thankful for Dr. Goode’s book because it gives parents the information they need to feel more confident in helping a child overcome fear and put any event into perspective. I think it is about time we begin to let go of our preconceived ideas about what is “normal” and begin to use the wisdom and principles in this book to help guide kids who see ghosts through their fear. I highly recommend this book to anyone who wants to learn more about this topic--especially those who work with children in any capacity.

Today is the launch for this book on Amazon. Get your copy at http://kidswhoseeghosts.com/buy-now/ and collect some terrific bonus gifts!

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For more information, you might enjoy reading the complete book More Than Meets the Eye True Stories about Death, Dying, and Afterlife. Purchase on Amazon.com

On Joy and Sorrow

An excerpt from The Prophet by Kahlil Gibran

A woman said, “Speak to us of Joy and Sorrow.”

And he answered, “Your joy is your sorrow unmasked. And the selfsame well from which your laughter rises was oftentimes filled with your tears. And how else can it be? The deeper that sorrow carves into your being, the more joy you can contain. Is not the cup that holds your wine the very cup that was burned in the potter’s oven? And is not the lute that soothes your spirit, the very wood that was hollowed with knives? When you are joyous, look deep into your heart and you shall find it is only that which has given you sorrow that is giving you joy. When you are sorrowful look again in your heart, and you shall see that in truth you are weeping for that which has been your delight. Some of you say, ‘Joy is greater than sorrow,’ and other say, ‘Nay, sorrow is the greater.’ But I say unto you, they are inseparable. Together they come, and when one sits alone with you at your board, remember that the other is asleep upon your bed. Verily you are suspended like scales between your sorrow and your joy. Only when you are empty are you at standstill and balanced. When the treasure-keeper lifts you to weigh his gold and his silver, needs must your joy or your sorrow rise or fall.”

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For more information, you might enjoy reading the complete book More Than Meets the Eye True Stories about Death, Dying, and Afterlife. Purchase on Amazon.com

Is That You, Jerry?

Jerry McEwen was a regular columnist for Writers in the Sky Newsletter. And, as the designer of WITS Web site in 2006, he was also a personal friend of mine. Jerry was fatally stabbed at a Kroger store parking lot in Nashville on December 18, 2007 while trying to stop a man who had just stolen a purse from a 60-year-old woman.

When Jerry died, I was catapulted into an empathetic episode like I had not experienced since I was serving as an intercessory prayer warrior for unity in the city of Muncie in the mid 1990s. This energy  I was carrying for Jerry's friends and family was so severe I had to call on a trusted friend to clear me of the grief. After that, I put up some really strong protective barriers to keep from taking on other people's energy. I really hadn't been affected much as an empath until the flood in Nashville May 2, 2010. The flood has brought many changes to our city and to the consciousness of those who live here. My business and I have been called to a new level of spiritual service.

Jerry contacted me after he died, but at the time, I really didn't have much confidence in my ability to communicate with ghosts. I was pretty sure I was hearing from him and that he was hanging around me during the weeks following his death, but I didn't want to do what he was urging me to do--contact his mom and sister (Dianne) and give them a message. The message was simple: "Tell them I am with Mason." The message didn't mean anything to me. I wasn't sure if Mason was a person, pet, bricklayer, or lodge member.

I hesitated giving them the message because I didn't know how open they were to having a stranger give them a psychic message; What if I was wrong and the message had no relevance to them? I didn't want to add to their grief. However, Jerry was insistent and at the time, I didn't know how to make ghosts go away. The only way I'd see peace from Jerry was for me to give his message to his family. So, I found their address and wrote a letter giving them my phone number and return address. I didn't hear anything from the family . . . until today.

Today, I got a letter from Dianne, stating that she now knew what the message about Mason meant. She asked me to phone her. When I did, she apologized for taking two and a half years to respond to my letter to her. Her letter to me came at the perfect time because of the message Spirit gave me about the blue jay earlier this week.

You see, my business endeavors had been taking all my time and attention over the past few years and I had not been focusing on developing my psychic skills. I did an interview with Lynn Serafinn May 5 in which I recounted some ghost activity I had encountered in the past. Like I said before, I had erected some strong barriers to keep ghosts away ever since Jerry's passing. After the interview, I marveled at how effective the protection really was. When I got the jay bird message this week, I acknowledged that I was ready to stop dabbling and get serious about developing my intuition and spiritual gifts.

Oh, and the message about Mason? She was a friend of Jerry's, who worked at the Kroger where Jerry died. He had visited with her just minutes before he walked outside and was killed in the parking lot. More than likely Jerry's spirit was hanging out around her after his death.

Yvonne Perry

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For more information about spirit communication, you might enjoy reading the complete book More Than Meets the Eye True Stories about Death, Dying, and Afterlife. Purchase on Amazon.com

Dust to Dust, Ashes to Ashes

We come from dust; we return to dust.

We all come from the Goddess and to Her we shall return like a drop of rain flowing to the ocean.

The 1662 version of the Book of Common Prayer indicated the manner and text of the burial service:
While the earth shall be cast upon the body (indicating green burial without formaldehyde, concrete vaults, and metal caskets) by some standing by, the Priest shall say,

"Forasmuch as it hath pleased Almighty God of his great mercy to take unto himself the soul of our dear brother here departed, we therefore commit his body to the ground; earth to earth, ashes to ashes, dust to dust; in sure and certain hope of the Resurrection to eternal life . . . "

Ashes to ashes derives from the English Burial Service. The text of that service is adapted from the Biblical text, Genesis 3:19 (King James Version): "In the sweat of thy face shalt thou eat bread, till thou return unto the ground; for out of it wast thou taken: for dust thou art, and unto dust shalt thou return."

The Ghost Whisperer Compared to Real Mediumship

I remember the first time I saw the Ghost Whisperer on CBS, I cried through most of the show. Why? Because I finally had a clue as to why spirits were coming to me. They wanted my help. They weren't trying to harm me or make me think I was crazy! I had ran out of explanations for why I would either see, hear, sense, smell, or just "know" that a spirit was near me. I concluded that I should not have prayed for the gift of discerning spirits—one of the nine gifts of the spirit outlined in 1 Corinthians 13:4-11.

Ghost Whisperer is not an accurate portrayal of what it's really like to be a medium—the show is for entertainment purposes but it does have some truth. While I have seen spirits, this is not the usual or only way I receive messages from them. The messages are much more subtle than portrayed on the Friday night hit show. Usually I get short messages or clues that I have to interpret using my own brain and intuition. These messages are mainly to give guidance and comfort to those who have been left behind.

I'm especially concerned for children who see ghosts because Jennifer Love-Hewitt's son Aiden on the Ghost Whisperer is being taunted by evil or dark spirits known as Shadows and these spirits are threatening Melinda. Death is frightening to most people. The TV series has the potential to create more fear of death through the mention of the Shadows. People and spirits are searching for comfort and closure.  Mediums are here to reduce the fear of death and help people to accept the passing of a loved one.  I did like the way Aiden saved Melinda in the final 2010 episode by making the Shadows let go of Melinda.

At times, the show suggests that boundaries cannot be set to keep malevolent entities from harassing and interrupting our lives. This is simply not true. You can work with higher beings of light who have the ability to prevent lower entities from coming into your field or influencing your life. I learned this the hard way after being beat up by what I thought were demons (thank you, Sunday School teachers and pastors of doom). There was even suggestions that I might be possessed, which was really scary! I now know that's not the case.

Whatever you think about and believe becomes your experienced reality. When I saw myself as a helpless victim of these "shadow" beings, it empowered my imagination to experience more of the same attacks. I have asked Archangels Michael and Chamuel to stand guard around me and screen the spirits who come to me for help. I've asked them to assist these spirits in finding the light so they are not allowed to influence or interfere with my own soul's spiritual progress or have my work day interrupted. I still have a"knowing" or sensing, but I because I have this angelic filter in place, I can trust that when I do have a spirit around me, my guides have allowed it entrance because it is mutually beneficial for the spirit and me to interact with one another.

What do you think about The Ghost Whisperer? Have you had an experience with or as a medium? Please share a comment on this post.

Being an Empath When Catastrophe Occurs - Part Two

Yesterday I talked about the flood in Nashville and how it was affecting me as a Light Worker and empath. I was feeling depressed, confused, and frustrated. I thought it had something to do with being an empath and connecting with the collective consciousness of humanity—Nashville in particular— but I had resigned from that role (so I thought) many years ago and was no longer in the business of carrying other people's negative energy as my own.

To make matters worse, my writing business was taking a hit. The business had been flourishing all year and I actually had leads "flooding" in so fast and heavy that I was pushing to train and bring on new team members to help carry the load. After the Nashville flood, all leads instantly stopped. For three weeks not a single person requested my writing or editing services. I was shocked because this had not happened in years.

Trying to figure out why I was so down, only made the symptoms worse and I had no desire to get out of bed in the morning. I didn't want to go into my office and scramble for a lead. I sensed it was time for me to just rest, relax, and meditate to get clarity, but I had no desire to do anything but simultaneously eat, watch TV, and play games on my laptop. I had to be doing something to keep my mind from worrying about my finances, business, emotional and physical health. By then, I was completely off my healthy eating regime and was drinking a lot of alcohol trying to soothe my soul. I know those things never work to fill the void or revive the spirit, but depression like this causes one to lose track of reality or to just not care.

I'll pick up with my story where I left off as my husband, Randall Hawk, was about to perform Hands of Light (a technique taught by Barbara Ann Brennan) energy work on me.

Using a pendulum, Randall Hawk found that my second and sixth chakras were nearly closed. The second chakra is the center responsible for lower emotions, creativity, and the function of the reproductive organs. The sixth chakra is the center of celestial emotions, and houses the ability to carry out ideas. After he opened and restored balance to these energy centers, my emotions returned to normal by the end of the day. By Monday, I was cheerful, hopeful, joyful, and renewed. It's great to have a husband who is spiritually awake and aligned with my divine journey.

Today, I have clarity that my business is taking a shift similar to that of Nashville. It is running parallel to what is occurring in the spiritual realm. Old things are washed away, all things are becoming new. I have a renewed sense of purpose knowing that my business is moving toward me having more time and energy to pursue my spiritual path and incorporate that into my business endeavors. Tomorrow, I'll talk about two confirmations that I've received regarding this insight.



It could be more than a year before everything in Nashville is restored, but once complete, it will be better, newer, fresher, and more alive than it was before the flood. This catastrophe gave us a reason to appreciate one another more than ever, do our part for the environment, and get rid of clutter in our lives, homes, businesses, and to better pursue our spiritual journey. I find it amusing that I was working with a Nashville author, Tisha Morris, on her book launch for 27 Things to Feng Shui Your Home.  I had already thrown out, given away, rearranged, rebuilt, and reworked everything in our home and office by the time the flood came. I'm positioned for renewal.

Being an Empath When Catastrophe Occurs

The first weekend in May 2010 brought an event to Nashville that those who live here will never forget. We knew we were in for some heavy storms, but we had no idea we were about to be flooded by a deluge of water that would swell rivers, lakes, and creeks to the point that more than 9,600 homes in addition to hundreds of businesses, vehicles, livestock, and human lives were destroyed. 
As twenty inches of rain fell in about twelve hours, the rivers rose and kept rising for two days until they crested at about fifty feet above average.

People were evacuated, some were rescued by boat, and others were without electricity and stuck on their side of the road where bridges and roadways had been washed out. Business and tourism was called to a halt as people tried to take in the shock of what had happened. Only when the waters receded enough for residents to return home, did they realized how bad the situation really was. One of the city's two water treatment plants was damaged and unable to operate for more than ten days, so all of Davidson County was put on a mandatory 50% reduction of water usage. Schools were flooded so bad in Cheatham County that the 2009-2010 school year was brought to an end. Music City was declared a state of emergency and FEMA was called in to assist. There were billions of dollars worth of damage, twenty-seven lives lost, and homes completely swept off their foundation and pushed by the raging current down the street (see the video: http://www.youtube.com/ ) like something you might see in a horror movie. But the horror was real.

Yet, many of you (including my parents, who live in Atlanta) didn't even know about it. Why? Because the media was covering the terrorist attempt in New York and the oil spill in the Gulf.

You can imagine how this affected those who are spiritually sensitive to the suffering of others or of Mother Gaia herself. For several weeks prior to the flood, my daughter-in-law felt angry but was puzzled as to why. Once the flood came, she felt a release and calm again. She was taking on the feelings of the Mother planet as she responded to our blatant misuse of her resources.

My emotional empathy began the day after the storm. I began feeling depressed and sad—almost to the point of tears, but physically, I had not been affected. Our property was safe; our children didn't have any damage to their homes or cars—in fact, my daughter and her husband were vacationing in Florida and I was watching their 10-month-old son. It wasn't until Tuesday that I learned that one of my team mates lost everything (even her hybrid car) when her home on the Harpeth River flooded. Another team mate's brother lived near the same area, and his home was also destroyed.

Yet the spirit of Nashville people was not angry, nor sad, nor depressed. They were pulling together to help one another gut their homes, and offering encouragement that even though the insurance companies would not pay for replacement or repair, they would get through it because they would work together to make sure everyone's needs were met. Being a celebrity city, several Nashville stars came together to produce benefit concerts and donated their own money to charities to help others rebuild.

The strong feelings of sorrow and helplessness continued to increase until I found a way to release it by becoming a clearing house for posting information online to help people know about community meetings, donation stations, and other events to help victims and volunteers find one another. Having that outlet helped a lot but I still continued to have underlying feelings of depression. That's when the phone calls and emails started.

People I had not heard from in a while started sending encouraging emails saying they were thinking about me; One left uplifting voice messages (I had retreated so much that I was not even answering my phone) to say she was sending me love and light. That made a huge difference. Their prayers and sending positive energy helped clear me of most of the despair I was feeling, but I was still not back to my usual jovial self and the hot flashes were still raging.

Last Saturday morning, my husband had watched me mope about long enough. He knew there was a spiritual cause for my emotional despair, so he insisted that I allow him to perform Hands of Light (a technique taught by Barbara Ann Brennan) energy work on me.  I'll speak more about this in a second part tomorrow.

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You might enjoy reading my book, More Than Meets the Eye True Stories about Death, Dying, and Afterlife, which is  available on Amazon.com